You are currently browsing the monthly archive for August 2008.
I had a good laugh!
Enjoy, Relli
Michelle Nichols lost her son to brain cancer. They only had 11 days from the time he was diagnosed until he passed away.
Michelle is bring out an amazing simple message – hug your kids today! let them know they are loved and that they are the most important asset of your life.
Forget work-life balance – Family comes first!
So, hug all your loved ones today, let them know you care.
Relli
Yesterday my kids drove me crazy! They would not listen, never the less do what I was asking them to do, and at some point I had it. I was angry with them, have no patience and using my high volume voice.
I was cranky and not so nice to be around. I knew that my mood has nothing to do with them, but their behavior really made things worse.
When I feel cranky, trying to justify it by being tired or ‘just one of these days’, I know I am cheating no one but myself. There is more to it than it looks. The question is What?
Although yesterday is a history, I feel that I need to find the source of my impatience . Partly, it is my growing belly which would not let me sleep, and the other parts are fear.
I was asking myself – fear of what?
As I kept looking into myself, I realize I am afraid of the coming change. 4 kids is a lot! How would it be? how would I manage a baby while running around the kids activities? how would the kids react, behave? how would it effect my relationship with my husband?
In a strange way , relizing my fears empowers me. Identifying what is going on put things in a space where I can work on. Now, I can take my fears and break them down into small pieces, When I do that, I am able to cope better with the change, and with what that needs to be done.
Few days ago, I heard a new ‘definition’ for fear :Forgetting Everything is All Right.
How appropriate ! I do need to remember that the coming change is a blessing, one of the biggest blessing in the world, and I get to experience it again!
Everything Is All Right, I just had to take the time to remind myself that!
I finally made it !
I have always wanted to have my picture in a public publication 😉 this is how you know you are really famous right? Just kidding.
Anyway, thought it would be fun to share with you too 🙂
http://www.cityofsanmateo.org/DocumentView.asp?DID=3159 – Page 13 – Mom’s Gym
I am the mom on the right (dark shirt) , caring my son Omer (which is way to heavy for that class …)
Great class by the way!
Enjoy, Relli
Few daus ago, I had an interesting conversation with one of my dearest friends for many years. For the sake of anonymity we will call my friend B.
B and I We have been friends for many years now, and in a very unique way have always manage to stay very close, building a very strong friendship although living very far away from one another. To me, the beauty of our friendship is that we are so different, but still respect one another decisions and opinions about life, while challenging one another to think and grow.
Thinking and growing together, is the best gift I could ask for, as my mom always says :”People can take many things from you, but they can never take away what you learned”.
Anyhow, we had a really interesting conversation yesterday about my blog. B asked me: “why should people read your blog? there are millions just like yours out there on the web. You need to find a way to differentiate you website from others”.
As B was talking I was thinking to myself: “good point. what does make my blog different?”
As our conversation continues, I realized that my blog is ME. At that point, this is what is different about it.
I was thinking that having millions blogs are in a way the same as having millions of people. let me explain –
In our world, where billions people live, we tend to be around people who we want to hang out with. We choose our friends because they have something that we like. We might choose them because they challenge us, make us feel good, are great listeners etc etc. The point is, that we CHOOSE who to listen to, be around, contact, stay in touch for ever and so on. It is a CHOICE.
The same for my blog – I choose to write what feels right for me, and it is not for everybody. When I am writing I am thinking “can someone out there can benefit from my experience? can it change their point of view? can it challenge them to think differently? “
If you choose to read my blog or not, it would be YOUR CHOICE. You choose to read it because there is value in it that is serving you.
Maybe other people already wrote something similar, but you felt the connection to my blog
So Why some people would read and some not?
The answer: Vibrations/Vibes
Different people sending different vibrations to the universe. I am sending a certain vibe, and if at that moment, it does not match your vibe, you will move on to another site. If it does, you will stay and come back. This is what I believe is happening is life (and in Blogs), at least in mine.
Going back to my conversation with B….
Sometime, even with the closest people we have in our lives, we don’t have the same vibes. Over the last few years, I learned to recognize it and accept it as an OK thing. B and I might not have the same vibe about my blog, but I am totally fine with it.
So, after we rapped up our conversation I thought to myself: ” few years ago, a conversation like this would have taken you down the drain, and you would be totally depressed, trying to figure out what is wrong with you! Look at you now, you can actually accept and respect others opinions, but have this inner feeling that you are doing the right thing! Look at how much you have grown! “
So, it you are doing something you believe in and that makes YOU feel good, keep doing it even if others (which you care a lot about) think it doesn’t make sense!
Trust your vibe, trust your true self to know what you are made of, knowing someone out there is benefiting from what you have to say/share.
This is what drives me – if I can make a difference in ones life, I know I did my share helping someone else grow!
To you 🙂 Relli
P.S. – this is my mission statement as written on my business card :
“My mission is to empower every person I meet to see the value within themselves, have an attitude of gratitude, acceptance and forgiveness for themselves and others”
I love readig Joe Vitale blog. Joe is a great inspiration to me, and I am always happy to share what I am fiding.
I loved this article because it made me think about how I do business, how I raise my kids and how I am looking at relationships with my people around me.
I hope you would love to learn about “The Greatest Motivator Isn’t What You Think—or, What I Learned From Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler on Valentine’s Day “, written by Joe Vitale.
It’s Valentine’s Day as I write this. Nerissa and I just returned from watching the new movie, “50 First Dates,” starting the beautiful Drew Barrymore and the funny Adam Sandler.
Besides being a hilarious movie in a beautiful setting with a heartfelt message of true love, it also caused me to have an “a-ha” right in the middle of it.
Somewhere around half way through the movie, as Adam is again reminding short-term memory loss victim Drew that he loves her, I suddenly realized the power of the greatest motivator of all time.
But let me first set the stage.
Most psychologists, direct marketers, and anyone who persuades for a living will tell you there are only two basic motivators: Pain or Pleasure.
You either go toward what you want or away from what you don’t want.
The standard argument is that pain is more powerful. I’ve tended to agree, but also stated I would not focus on pain for idealistic reasons.
I simply don’t want to spread pain in the world. Focusing on it causes you to feel it. I don’t want to contribute to the misery many feel.
So my stance has been to focus on pleasure as a motivator in my sales letters and websites.
Most marketing experts agree that pain is the best trigger to focus on in any ad or sales campaign. They love to find a prospect’s basic problem, and then rub their noses in it. They figure the pain would make the person buy or change.
The most common example they give is the insurance salesman who tries to sell you home coverage.
If he focuses on pleasure, you will put off buying.
If he tells you your house is on fire, you will buy. Pain causes immediate action.
So, like everyone else, I “knew” pain was the greater motivator. I simply focused on pleasure because it is a more noble route.
But then I saw Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler in their new movie and suddenly I felt awakened, energized, and validated.
Here’s the film’s plot in a nutshell:
Adam is in love with a woman who can’t remember anything from the day before, due to a head injury in an auto accident the year before. Every day is a new day. And every day Adam has to win her over again. Every date is new. Hence the title, “50 First Dates.”
At one point in it, as Adam was again wooing Drew, I suddenly realized what I was really seeing.
I saw pleasure was the greatest motivator of all.
I saw pleasure was the greatest motivator of all.
Adam was pursuing Drew every day, despite the pain and the odds, because of his growing love for her. He was going after pleasure. The pleasure goal was so powerful it erased every pain he might experience.
In short, all the marketing experts who say pain is the greatest motivator have forgotten the power of our driving force in life: Love.
People will scale mountains with luggage on their backs, swim upstream in a hurricane, and battle armies and all odds in order to fulfill that hard-wired emotion in us to love and be loved.
Love rules.
All the examples we were given were unfair. Someone trying to sell insurance and resorting to pain hasn’t figured out the real pleasure button to make someone buy. They’ve been too lazy to search for the pleasure trigger.
ocusing on pain was simply an easy cop-out, a handy approach.
It’s the same with all the massive ad campaigns that fail. Trying to get someone to quit smoking or stop drugs because of the pain they depict in the ad is the wrong approach.
It’s the same with all the massive ad campaigns that fail. Trying to get someone to quit smoking or stop drugs because of the pain they depict in the ad is the wrong approach.
If we suddenly focused on the pleasure someone would have when they stopped smoking or taking drugs, we’d be moving in the right direction.
This is so obvious to me after watching the movie. Our goal as marketing and business people isn’t to tell people what’s wrong with them or to remind them of their pain, but to help them imagine and then experience the pleasure they long to have.
It’s noble, yes, *and* it works.
Love moves everyone.
Love is the great motivator.
Love is the great pleasure trigger.
Love is the great motivator.
Love is the great pleasure trigger.
According to my friend Kevin Hogan, author of “The Psychology of Persuasion,” love isn’t an emotion but a mindset. And as a mindset, it is actually stronger than any emotion.
In short, you’re dealing with the most powerful motivator of all time.
Reveal what there is to love about your product or service and you’ll give people authentic reasons to do business with you. Call it Love-Based Marketing. You won’t sell everyone with it. You’ll sell only those who are a match for your offer.
That, in the end, is all you want. Then you’re happy and so are your customers.
Just like Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler, you’ll find a match to write home about.
And you might make a little money along the way, to boot.
And you might make a little money along the way, to boot.
Every year, twice a year there is a wonderful event out in the woods, that my family loves to attand.
When you come to this place and you are asking where the bathroom are, you will be pointed to a tiny ‘outdoor’ toilet.
As I entered this tiliet for the first time, I saw this Community sign and thought to myself – how true!
So, get off your coach, turn off TV and Turn on life 🙂
Relli
As a student and a teacher of Personal Development, I spent a lot of time working on my fears. I still have many fears, but learning to recognize them and understanding them, helps me get over them taking one step at a time!
Anyhow, the other day while I was listening to Hayhouseradio I got to hear a new definition for FEAR ( I am collecting those 😉 )
Forgetting
Everything (is)
All
Right
I loved it 🙂 This is a great POSITIVE way to look at fear, it bring the good vibes out helping me remember to look at what is OK rather then what’s wrong !
So remember – fear is an illusion, you are just Forgetting that Everything is All Right 🙂
To you, Relli
Everyday I get a daily email called “insight of the day”. When I opened my computer this morning I saw this quote:
“Circumstances may cause interruptions and delays, but never lose sight of your goal. Prepare yourself in every way you can by increasing your knowledge and adding to your experience, so that you can make the most of opportunity when it occurs.'”
( Mario Andretti. Auto Racer)
As a big believer that there is a greater power out there in the universe, I felt like there was no better quote for me for this morning. You are probably wondering why that is, so let me tell you.
In the last few months, my life is constantly changing to prepare myself, my family, my house and my life for my 4th child. In the last year I have created a very clear vision about my life and especially about my career path. I thought I got it all together and I had a plan. As time passed, the plan got clearer and clearer and I was very happy with my progress. The right people came into my life, lots of opportunities and I felt great about the way things are moving along. Now, let me take you to my reality, and tell you what is happening today. While my body is constantly growing and changing, and my hormones are running like crazy in my body (or maybe running my body is more accurate….) I am realizing that with the changes that are coming up, I need to change my plan.
“Never loose sight of your goal” is what is moving me now forward. I know things would change, and change is welcome, but sometime, I just want things to be just like I planned them– sounds familiar?
Today, I am preparing myself for what’s to come; I am learning and growing so when the right opportunity and the right people come into my life, I will be ready.
To preparation, family and change, Relli
“Often we allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. We lose many irreplaceable hours brooding over grievances that, in a year’s time, will be forgotten by us and by everybody. No, let us devote our life to worthwhile actions and feelings, to great thoughts, real affections and enduring undertakings.”
Andre Maurois1885-1967, Writer
Relli Siege 